yeeeeaaaaa i just got home. wow... what a fucking awesome day mian. opera was the best outta the three performances, in my opinion. probably because i was in a good mood first of all, and my family was there, even though they came late and missed the whole Act 1. it was nice having them there tho. my mum didn't have any idea what was going on, but my brother sorta did, cuz he actually read the program! *gasp!* anyways, HOLY SHIT!! drama on Seagram Floor 3... Joanna just came out, well, burst out of her room, and started yeliing at Colleen.... they started yelling, literally at each other, now Colleen is in her room with Mel, crying her eyes out.... whoa... scary. my poor heart...

anyways, what i was going to post before all this was what happened last night. i don't really know why i'm posting this... basically for my own record... anyways, yeah, so! last night i got off the phone with matty, and it was another bad call. i cried my little heart out after, and had to take a walk... well, i walked around my kitchen, and then decided to take a bath to calm my senses. anyways, by that time i was already better... a bit. being the weirdo that i am, i took my laptop in with me. ha! yeaaa.... right when i was going in the bathroom, Mel came in the door, and she laughed at me. hahah wutever! anyways, i start talking to Mike and Fran, and Fran had to go, then i was talking to Mike, and i'm like, "yea, i'm bored." so mike's like "let's do something!" so then we made plans to go to his place, watch movies and drink.

*sorry i just paused for like an hour.... talking with room mates... we resolved a lot of stuff now, it's okay.*

anyways, i'm tired of writing in detail soooo
- went to Mike's, at UP, thanks to foot patrol still working at fucking 2:45am
- went to UP, got mike to give me food, hung out in flat, watched 50 First Dates (hilarious!), while eating.
- finished off mike's kahlua with milk (YUM!!)
- decided not to open my coconut rum, cuz i didn't really feel like getting drunk or anything. i was mellow...
- finished watching 50 First Dates, still wasn't tired, started watching Van Wilder
- what a boring movie, mian.... mike liked it though... pah. only because it had topless women on it! stupid michael jang
- i was tired by 5:45, so i told mike to shove over and let me sleep... i don't think i actually fell asleep til close to 6, but i fell asleep while he was still watching the movie.
- woke up at like 11:30am ish, and went back to sleep on my little corner of the pillow.
- had this weird-ass dream
- next time i woke up, mike's roomie, ty, came in and went on his bed (he moved to the couch after this girl passed out on his bed)
- third time i woke up, some weird guy was standing at the door talking to ty and mike. he left. we all went back to sleep
- finally got up at 12:30
- hung around til 1:30, went back to rez, where i posted that post down there

all in all, it was an excellent day, compared to what i've been having lately. anywhoo.... gotta watch the Oscars, so... bub bye!

P.S. OMG OMG OMG it's JUUUUUUUULIE ANDREWS!!!!!

wow! what a night! haven't been up so late since the history essay! hahah Mel just asked about my night... trying to get something out of me. lol! anyways, getting ready to go to opera again... last time! ahhhh i can't wait!
my parents called this morning telling me Bernard's mom isn't coming in anymore, so they are coming, and seeing the opera too. yay!

anyways, time to go... will post more later

the first thing, or person i saw this morning when i got out of my room was Ramiz and his cousin... it was kinda freaky. i really didn't wanna get up this morning... so freakin tired.. bah. i managed to stay up til 4:15 ish alongside Tracy. haha crazy. oh wutever, mian. i need to practise.. goddammit. not looking forward to tonight.. bah. kill meeee

at least i've got my coconut rum. yum? i dunno yet. ha i can party with myself. how pathetic.

--> down to 12 Cho Changs...

In an instant, it's all down the drain. How can there still be such anger, after so long? Too many tears i have shed for this, is it really worth it? i am tired of this, being ripped apart time and time again. What i want isn't important anymore. nothing concerning me is important. i am not important. now, it's like a ornament, taped up, trying to take its original form, but in reality, only mere pieces of glass.

all i asked was respect, maybe responsibility, maybe even just a little bit of love, but maybe even that was too much. what can i do now, but pretend to be that ornament? i can pretend....

it's been a long night... actually... no. it went quickly. but it was still long. opera was fine. so tiring! one down, two to go! AHHH!!! i was sooo hungry when i came back. now me so tiiiired. oh oh!! one good thing about the opera tonite: when we got there, we found candies on everyone's stand!! i guess tihs is a way of thanking us (for rehersals, or the performance? i dunno).

Ramiz and his cousin are at our place studying... it's such a nice friday night... quiet. not lonely quiet, but peaceful quiet. i like that.

Matty DITCHED me today. he had to skate downtown, even though he hates downtown. that sucked.
ummmmmmmmmm... i can't think about that anymore. i am trying to force myself not think of anything related to the subject of Matty & I. argh...

i want to sleep... i want to talk to Matty.... bah. he's too busy skating though. hmph! dum dum dummmm...

ok too tired to post anymore.

i am shocked!!! THIS is Wormtail (aka. Peter Pettigrew, aka. Scabbers)?!?! totally NOT what i pictured him to be... (well, according to Mugglenet, it's not confirmed to be the actual PoA movie shot, but i'm pretty sure it's real)

ok i'm watching this show called Super Millionaire, it's hosted by Regis, or however you spell his name. anyway, with his show, the most you can win is 10 million dollars!! jebus! this dude just won 30, 000$. holeeee

anyway... i have nothing to write. i need a hug... and something to do!

hello my fellow blog readers! it's such a beautiful day outside! i wanna ride my bike... but i don't have a bike here! eeee! i skipped psych this morning oops. i didn't feel like getting up and walking all the way to the NAB. according to Kyla, tihs girl in my religions and psych class, psych was interesting this morning. oh well!
i'm filling in a course add form, hoping to get into the psych distance education for the summer, which is an internet course. i REALLY need it, mian!! i am gonna take a minor in psych, since i need 4 credit in psych anyways for Mus.Thereapy. might as well, eh?

anywhoo.. nothin much else to post... i might do another one later on tonight.

hmmmmm... i'm really starting to dread nights. and not because of opera. i don't care about that.
goddamn nights... too many alone time. too quiet. too much solitude makes mandy go crazy! fuuuuuck.
but seriously.
i can't wait to be back in toronto now.... i think, well i hope Jeff, or anyone can come job searching with me! i need people, people!!

on a brighter note, today was a good day, compared with yesterday. although i didn't wanna get for skills, breakfast was fun, and well worth waking up for-- Ian and his jiz sweater.. lol! hilarious! Shannon, we all love you, even if you do live in Walkerton....hahaha!! oh man... to many jokes (S: "Well.... we do have one bus" I: "hahaha a school bus!" not even the full size ones! the little bus with Walkerton on the side." LOL!! gosh...)
welll, anyways, i'm really looking forwrd to summer, Shannon's most likely gonna come visit me nad Fran and Tracy, and we can take Shannon to Ikea! (She's never been to an Ikea, thanks to living in Walkerton) and... lots of other cool (NORMAL) places Shannon's never been to! hahaha awww... now i feel bad, cuz im making fun of her too....but it's soooo funny!

And Liz found my music! YAY. apparently someone found it at the front door of her rez and put it on top of the buzzing counter. wheww...

opera was good... long... tired... bah.

TAG MY BOARD PUH-LEEEEEZE! it's lonely... like me....

man, i am having such a fucking horrible day. first psych, religions, boring concert, bad rehersal with Beth Anne, losing my fucking music, BAD masterclass, and the horrible phone call with matt.

gawd...

well, at least Fran cheered me up! *smiles* i love her, she's such a dear. and the last 20 minutes of American Idol cheered me up too. and Colleen's peanut butter cookie. thanks Cole!

i need to sleep soon... i know i won't though. i never really do. ah welllll...

type type type what to post about? it has been sorta a reminsing/thinking day so far. psych and religions class didn't really help. i hate when u learn something, and you realize it's happening in your life too, and blah blah blah... it's so depressing. i didn't forget about Music at Noon though. i almost fell asleep. pahh... well i was resting my eyes at one point, and then the song was done, Ian, who was sitting besides me was like "you fell asleep! i saw you!" hahah right. well, maybe so, but so was Francine! it wasn't a bad concert, it was just.... a tiring day i guess? meh, i dunno!
it was tracy's birthday yesterday! two boys invited her to ice cream! hahaha!! me and mike were like "oooh tracy's got a date!" hahah she's so fun to tease. tee hee! and then today she was telling me and ian how her friends all surprised her and how surprised she was. haha! oh tracy....

bah, i have to practise with Beth Anne later. poopie. oh well. i really don't feel like playing. my neck hurts. too much playing the past three days.

anyways... im contemplating whether or not to go home next weekend... not the coming one (damn opera), but the next one.. hmmm.... i might. hafto look fer a job. argh. err... i mean... yay! oh! AND i might be able to hang out with some people who have reading week this week before they go back! hmmmmmmm....

omg, i want to paint.

.......... why do you always give me false hope? waiting... waiting...

opera rehersal today went okay. the whole production was ran- including costumes, props, and the acting! it was so exciting! the lights were cool, and the costumes were pretty! it actually seemed like an opera, pretty coooool. Mike was being an asshole. laughing in the middle of nowhere? uhhh.... riiiight. weirdo. he poked Rod with his bow out of nowhere, and then started laughing. after playing, and resting again, like so long after the incident. he's still laughing. oh my god.

anyway, uhh... i'm very tired, so i think i'm going to bed. good night.

btw, Skills exam? bleh. that's all i've gotta say.

*WHEW* ok so i just came back from my second 3-hour pracise of the day. we had two 3-hour practises today with the damn opera. the only good thing about these two practises were 1) no clock, so i couldn't see the time and 2) the whole cast of the opera were there singing with us, so it's not as boring. anyways, by the end of the first practise session, i was so tired, i totally zoned out. like, i was playing and stuff, but my mind wasn't there at all. it was weird. i went home, took a shower, made dinner, ate dinner, sat around a bit, then left again. ahhhh. the second round at first felt better, cuz we were all energized again, but nope, it was more tiring! when Les made us go back about like 30 bars, i was like "noooo!! don't go backwards!!" but obviously not outloud. haha well, loud enough so that only Mike, my stand partner, could hear. anyways, during the break, Laura, this fellow violin player, started teaching me and Rod (rigo) yoga stretches... damn, they were good! really streches the muscles... ahhhh.... i have to do some later. my muscles are really tense.

anyways, Mel gave me a cookie...after two creamsicles. yummmm hehehe.. i'm so frickin sleepy! argh. still got skills exam tomorrow...bah. ok i have nothing else to post.

i hope emilia calls me soon, i really need to talk to her. bahhh

yay im back! well, i've been back since probably like 11:30 this morning. we went to see that townhouse my parents wanted to buy. it was nice outside, but crappy inside. ah well. it only needs renovating, ya know. then we dropped audrey off and went to my place to drop off my stuff too. went to lunch then dropped me off at...oprea rehersal!! YAAAAYYYYY!!!!! (goddamn.) anyways, it was a LONG 3 hour practise, and by 5, i was dead tired!! bahhh... anyways, since i came back i did like no work. well, i looked over my Skills prepared melody and rhythm, but that's about it. pahhh... oh well. i will do it tomorrow... promise. lol i don't even know who i'm promising.... myself, i guess. anyways, i'm so freakin tired, mian. and i miss people. some more so... stupid tim.... always cancelling on me. pah. anyways, umm.... i'm full, just ate din-din. but it was yum-yum! hehehe

i should call emilia, see how she did with the phone call. hm. mehhhh... anyhoo, i'm outtie in the retirement home! (don't think i don't remember my PUTE!)

** Mar, if u wanna comment, just write in my my tagboard at the top of the page!

fuck, what a night it has been. and last night too, but tonight's post is going to be about tonight. so yea... i got my hair cut (sorry Mar, didn't save ya any!). not too short, but it looks pretty good, compared with the last couple of haircuts i've had before. so anyways, it was cool, and my parents went out to dinner, and i got tha car (yeah!) called up emilia, and went to stc. all was good, ya know.. walked around and crap. then everything closed and we went to the theater and talked our asses off. two and a half whole hours goddammit!! stories were explained from eons ago, and recently. tears were shed and and anger was built up. apologies given and so were explanations. so...i guess all in all, it wasn't a waste of a night. anyways, i am tired now, and very anxious to get back to waterloo (actually...to be honest...... not really. but still.) and play some goddamn opera!! just kidding. that is the last thing i want to do. what i really want to just to be back with my friends again, and maybe not face my problems for once.

ok you know what i absolutely hate? (besides the obvious) people who always claim to be your friend, but are never really there for you, never really want to talk to you, never really want to know what you're up to, but only ask for convo sakes. i also hate the fact that i always fall for it. bend over backwards to make them happy, but never get anything back in return. lies and secrets definately do not make friends.

ok i did lots of journal, blog, and xanga readings, and i must say i'm impressed with everyone's activities! sorta... it wouldn't top my night last night, that's for sure.

carmen msged me at 10:10pm last night asking me out to coffee with jordan and kevin, so i said sure. i didn't get picked up til close to 11. filled up some gas and was on our way to sweet sweet downtown. there were Starbuck's on every corner, but none of them were open. we walked through the Village, all the while listening to Jordan tell us Queer as Folk filmed on that street, and Kevin giving me evil looks and Carmen.... just walking like a normal person would. *ahem*. so we finally decided to head back to Scarborough, but we never did, becuz we went to a Timmys near Kevin's cousin Chase's garage to look at Kevin's truck. We had our drinks there, then proceeded to look at the truck. it was grand! we had tuns of fun jumping in the bed of the truck, thus causing it to shake and bounce. and Kevin took the sun roof off. we left a while later, and after deciding not to drive me home yet, we went cruising...to Old Finch (DUHN DUHN DUHN!). well, at first i didn't really know what was there, maybe a bowling alley, like Old Kennedy? but Carmen said it was a haunted place (ooooohh!!). when we got there, it was freaky cuz there were NO street lights and no other cars. i scrambled to the back seat, cuz i didn't wanna sit in the front, in full view of what CAN happen. so Carmen got in the front, and we just drove down roads and over bridges. Luckily, at the supposedly scariest part, i had my eyes closed. whew! the the roads were very eerie. i could feel it! we drove past a car wreck place where it's supposed to be really haunted cuz people got smushed between cars there. we drove around the place a couple of times actually (not the car wreck, just the whole place in general). anyways, so carmen decided to tell me the story about his friend albert, who went with his friends. she couldn't really remember the entire story, so she just told us what she remembered. it was scary! she's gonna call him and ask about the full story. anyway, jordan wanted kevin to tell the really really scary story about aliens, but i didn't let him because it was night time and i can't take that sort of thing at night. so then he agreed to tell me it during the day sometime. anyways, i got home around 1:30, and had kevin walk me to the door cuz i was pretty creeped out... hahaha! and i couldn't really sleep last night... well, i did eventually of course, but it took a while. i also had very long, twisted, weird dreams. but not about ghosts. anyways, i'm starting to get creeped out thinking about it again, so i'm gonna stop typing....

my comments things is totally messed up, i dunno why. mehh...

bah.... so bored at home, mian....
i don't even have anything to post about, that's how bored i am.
bah.

oh, Mar, i used Enetation, i hope you don't mind! i've actually been to this place before, but whatever! I have a commenting thingy!! SO COMMENT PEOPLE!!!!!

spanks!

so nique and i went to visit mr. lum yesterday, and it was pretty fun! i'm sure he liked our carepackage! hahaha and not to mention the card we worked so hard on. lol
we hung around aci til like 4:30 ish then went to mike's house (only after we went to nique's, got the car, and drove mike to the dentist). we hung there til a bit after 7, and when i realized nique wasn't driving us back home, matty and i left. it was cold outside! hahah but it was alright. i got home safely.

dum dee dum.... oh! i was watching this talkshow this morning, and William Hung, the HILARIOUS dude from American Idol who sung "She Bangs" was on and he sang!! it was soooo funny, and horribly out of tune! lol hilarrrrious! hahah anyways, i have 3 hours to....do productive work, so i better get a move on! bub bye!

so i came back to toronto yesterday around lunch time. the trip was okay.. the bus driver stopped at Guelph for a really long time. i was impatient. ah well. then i went out to lunch with my parents. it was the best meal i had in a while. yumm... hehehe! i got home and margaret called me, cuz we were supposed to do something together, so we planned a movie. but then she had gotten herself grounded, so no more movie going. ah well. i went shopping with my dad too, and got pictures developed from sooo long ago! like Christmas and stuff. and from the music formal! yay! we were all so purdy!! hehehe
Mar wanted me to get a new commenting system so i tried looking for some. i found one and tried it, but i don't think it's working beause i don't see anything. ah well.

going to Nique's later to put together Lummy's carepackage! awww heheh i wore my new black lacy shirt in got two weeks ago. it's purdy! heheh anyways i was watching Life's Little Miracles last night and there was this kid named Joseph, and he was getting a pacemaker. ubt since he's so little, his was put near his stomach instead of the chest, like mine. and his doctor's the smae as mine! so i saw my doctor on TV. well, technically, he's not my doctor anymore, but still...

OMG. i just realized that Mike, my stand partner, reminds me of Wayne, from ACI. hahah ewww...lol ah well... i'm chatting with ihm on msn, and it just came to me. weird, eh.

anyway, not much more to post, so ta-ta my lovelies!

for all HP lovers (obsessors, such as myself): a very intersting article on Victor Krum auditions

yay happy Valentine's day
good riddance.

anyway! i really don't know what to do today... after this cd finishes, i'll probably practise a bit... take a walk, do things i can do by myself. it's snowing. maybe i'll go outside and catch some snowflakes on my tongue. hmmmmm... yum. my room is so freakin warm. i already turned down my space heater. meh. wutever.

i had these weird dreams last night. one of them was about school people. then i woke up, and since it was so early i went back to sleep and had a weird dream about my extended family. ah well. i don't think colleen came back last night. ah well. i hope she didn't get too trashed. she can really drink if she wanted to. anyway, yeah. i don't really know what to post. i think i'll go pop some bubbles. Marijn sent me this website yesterday cuz i was SO BORED. it's just this fun perpetual bubble wrap thing. it's kinda fun. entertained me for about 5 minutes.

i kinda want to go back to toronto right now and hang out with some people (namely margaret and jeff). Jeff's been having lots of problems lately regarding the subject of Ella. tsk tsk... love is blind. it really is. well, at least now he sees that it was a mistake to stay in that relationship for so long. but it's all life experience, so... all we can do now is just be there for him.

i should start looking for a job now. i know Mar is looking too. i sorta want to work in HSC, but i don't wanna take the subway everyday downtown to work. hmmm... i wanna volunteer at HSC too, but i still want to work full time. Andr? was like "you want the money, don't you?" when i told him i might work instead of volunteer. and i was like "yeeeaaa.." hee hee but i really do want to work at HSC. well, we'll see what happens.

i called my mom last night and she said Bernard's mom's relative has this townhouse in Waterloo she wants to sell because her kid graduated already. so my mom and Amy (Bermard's mom) will go look at it sometime next week, and MAYBE they'll buy it. I hope it's close to WLU, then i can still walk to school. but see, Bernard goes to UW, and Howard (my brother), and Eugene (a family friend's son) might go to UW too, so... if we all live there, it's better if it's closer to UW. but then my mom siad if it far then she'll give me like a sued car and stuff, so i can drive to school. yayyy. but nothing is for sure yet. i mean, i don't mind living with them (all boys! ack) but i will most likely want to live with my friends too. ah well. we'll see what happens anyway. there is a high chance i'm not going to live on 277 State St. in my third year. i don't really like our landlord. she's quite a bitch when she wants too, esp that incident with Francine. sheesh! but that's like a year and a half away, so i'll think about it some other time.

pah. anyways, i'm going back to TO tomorrow. i don't know what i'll be doing for four days... meeehhh... anyways. maybe i'll call up Denny, see what he wants to do.. and i can always go downtown and hang out at HSC... look for a job there. iiiii dunno. anyways, i should do something productive. bub bye

as i sit here, all alone, it is you who run through my mind... my cry silenced by too many thoughts.

fuck poetry. i suck at it. but anyways, yeah, i'm still in Waterloo. i'm such a loser. and not to mention, a loner as well. god dammit. it's only 10:15 right now. still got a whole fucking night to kill. and then a whole fucking day. ahhh... and will toronto be any better? i really don't know. i hope so.

god dammit...i'm still hurting... dammit dammit dammit.... Josh Groban's You're Still You isn't helping matters much either... but whatever. i really need a new hobby. Become addicted to lottery tickets, win, and fly to Holland and visit Marijn. that'll do.

i'm only kidding. (about visiting Marijn)

oh god... i'm am such a loser.

ok goodnight.

last night was sooo much fun! carmen, nique and i were on this cool MSN emoticons website downloading all these cool emoticons. the best one was Harry Potter! oh man, it's sooo awesome! anyways, around 2, i decided that i should really go to sleep because i had to go to psych today...mainly for allison, cuz i didn't go on tuesday, so she's giving me her notes, and i'm gonna give her my notes.
anyways, yeah i almost died today, i was so tired. i took a two hour nap before my lesson. ahh...so nice... then i went to my lesson (it was a kinda bad one..meh) then practised with Beth Anne, then i was bored for like 80 minutes, then went to sectionals. bahhh... i'm still tired, but i gotta practise for skills midterm tomorrow. grrrr.... then psych PREP (research thingy), then SHOPPING!! YAAAYYY!!!

anywhoo... yea, i'm watching Without a Trace with Colleen. it's almost over. man, what a good show.. ok now it's over.

ok back to macgamut...this time it's not so bad, becuase i don't have to hand it in. i'm just doing practise runs for....practise! that's right! damn chords. alright, i'm out.

owww... my head hurts from too much staring at the screen. if i go blind i'm sue-ing Laurier Music for making us do so much MacGamut. owwiiee... darn computer screen. ack!
anywhoo... yea, it's progressing slowly.... still got a long way to go. bleh. tee hee

tomorrow is Ian's birthday. he's turning...20!! holy moly macaroni!

in HP news, i watched a clip from www.mugglenet.com about auditions for a Cho Chang. YAY! and there have been 52 finalist for Krum boys in Bulgaria. i wonder who will make it! they better choose someone good! or else!! and today, i read a lot of editorials from mugglenet.com ( i love that site) and a lot of their analyzing of the books made me think a lot. FOR EXAMPLE:

(SPOILER AHEAD!!!)










Arabella & Argus: Coincidental Cat-Lovers or the Same Person?

One of the things that I never thought possible about the Harry Potter series, is that two characters could actually be the same person. Of course, after reading Goblet of Fire, I realized how easy this actually was. There are lots of clues that tell us that certain characters are hiding things, but I think I may have figured out a huge septology clue.

We all know about Argus Filch. He is the school caretaker; a kind of janitor who also seconds for a snitch. He seems to despise students and goes out of his way to make the lives of students miserable. We do not really know much about him, except that he likes to torture people, get them into trouble, he gets mad at Peeves, and he has a pet cat named Mrs. Norris (kind of odd, right?). We also suspect that he might be a squib because of his suspicious nature when Harry discovered the Kwikspell manual in his office. I really think that Filch is hiding something. And what is it with his obsession with Mrs. Norris? I am sure that all of you that have pets may seem a little sympathetic, but this cat is a little odd. I wonder what kinds of clues she may hide, but we will get back to her in a minute.

This brings us to our other cat-lover, Arabella Figg. We do not know much about her, except that she used to baby-sit Harry while the Dursleys were out, her house smelled like cabbage, and they used to sit around looking at pictures of cats all day. This surely seemed innocent enough when you read it the first time, but after Order of the Phoenix, this is very suspicious.

So what if they are the same person? First of all, they have the same initials (AF). So what, big deal. Everything in Rowling’s world is done for a reason. We know that Mrs. Figg is a squib. We can assume that Filch also is one. Can squibs still change bodies with the Polyjuice Potion? Possibly, but we do not really know. I personally think that one can, as long as a wizard is the one concocting it. Also, Mrs. Figg’s house smells like rotten cabbage, exactly as the Polyjuice Potion does. It is safe to assume, I think, that someone at Mrs. Figg’s house is experimenting with the potion, even if it is not her (we will come back to this in a minute). And well, they both like cats…a LOT. Their seeming obsession with cats is very unusual (even for the wizarding world) and could mean something very important.

We know from Mrs. Figg’s own comments that the cats that live with her act like spies. It was a cat who alarmed her of Mundungus Fletcher’s disappearance when he was supposed to be keeping an eye on Harry. We can assume that Dumbledore stationed Mrs. Figg near Harry in order to keep an eye on him (although he never really liked going over there).

One question that we need to have answers is how squibs live. Since they are born to wizards and witches, one can assume that squibs would have a hard time living with them without being able to do magic. However, if they were raised by witches and wizards, living as a muggle would be difficult as well (eckeltricity?). This is where the tent from Goblet of Fire becomes a semi-significant clue.

One fan of the Quibbler wrote in and told me that perhaps the tent that the Weasleys borrowed for the Quidditch World Cup may be a sort of template that the wizarding world uses to help blend into the muggle world. More simply, the tent reminds Harry of Figg’s house (they look exactly the same). Since they are so similar, Mrs. Figg’s house may actually be a creation of the wizarding world to blend in. This would definitely fit for the squib problem because they would not know how to live as a muggle or a wizard. Thus, the tent/Figg’s house mystery would be solved, but ends up not being too significant, unless we see the same layout in a different form.

Now that the tent tangent has been explained, back to the theory at hand. We really only hear about Figg during Harry’s summer holidays from school, and we only hear about Filch during the school year. This is not significant, but could be if we knew that Figg went on holiday during the school year as well. As far as we know, she does not, and has never taken a leave from her home on Wisteria Walk. She did break her leg once, but there is no real connection to Filch on this one.

So what exactly is the deal with the fascination of the cats? We know (as mentioned earlier) that the cats act as spies. Mrs. Norris acts as a second set of eyes to Filch around Hogwarts and Mr. Tibbles was the cat who alerted Figg about Dung. Cats cannot talk (even in the wizarding world, unless they are animagus), but what if there was some different sort of communication? Perhaps when squibs die, they become cats. This would explain the obsession with cats by both squibs here, as well as start an argument for the way that they communicate. Maybe this is how squibs are able to keep their ties with the wizarding world. If this theory were true, then Crookshanks and an animagus like McGonagall would be called into question.

No matter what, there are things that we know. First of all, Argus Filch’s name means “a thousand eyes” which completely fits for his job of being able to maintain the school and be the disciplinarian. But if we look at Arabella Figg’s name, a fig leaf is used to conceal certain (ahem) male body parts in ancient Greece. If we were to take this name clue figuratively, we could assume that Figg is not who she seems to be and that she is hiding something (that would explain the Polyjuice Potion smell). If we would take it literally, then perhaps Figg is hiding a particular male body part as well (supporting my theory).

Some fans have written in to say that they think Figg may actually be Mrs. Norris. While there is no evidence to disprove this, I think there is much more evidence pointing to the theory stated above. I have said it a million times, and I will continue to: Rowling does not do things for no reason and everything points to something else. Why would Rowling make these two characters have the same initials? Why would she have them both have an obsession for cats? Why would she have them both keeping all eyes on Harry? Why would she have them both be squibs? Perhaps squibs are more perceptive to muggles since they have no magical powers. I believe that there is a big connection between Filch and Figg, and if they are not the same person, all signs point to the fact that they are related or linked in some way.

i just got off the phone with Matty a couple of minutes ago. it was very upsetting and tearful. it ended okay though. i vented out almost everything. i really needed to, and it helped a bit. i know how shitty Matty feels about all this and i'm sorry for it, but i can't help it. i tried setting things right, though, even though i was the one angry as hell first. few people really know how i felt yesterday. it was not pretty. anyways, i'm starting to get off topic. the point of this post is........ well, i don't really know. i can't sleep right now, and i just want a hug and someone to tell me everything will be alright. but it's quiet and everyone is sleeping, and nobody is going to give me a hug and tell me everything is alright.

life is shitty right now, but we'll get over it. if life were a tightrope, this is only a wobble. the walker has not fallen just quite yet.
***

Matty, remember, we have to be friends forever and die together. you just told me that. we have a long way to go. i hope that this is just a wobble in the tightrope. call me anytime. Rusty says hi.

a little something i found whilst browsing the www:

"It all starts without warning, a loved one or trusted authority thrusts a sharp dagger slicing deep into the child's innocent heart shattering its safe world of love with betrayal. A reflex pulls the heart away as the first painful emotion brings a fear of death and insecurity. Stunned in disbelief the child's mind scrambles to make sense of the puncture the heart has just sustained. Confused and unable to comprehend the assault, the child accepts full responsibility. Year after year the pattern continues, as trust becomes a distant memory.

Deep within solitude and far from discovery the mirror of the buried heart reflects failure and loneliness. The mind caught off guard responds with a legion of proof the inner voice is a lie. As time passes and silent to all others, the heart's once small whisper increases to a scream the mind can not suppress. Plunging into a darkness of conviction and despair a knowing of the failure permeates the body. Shocked by the inner betrayal, a rage is created that will not relent. Over and over you seek for the one to blame, but none can be found. Through desperate fear the mind has the solution. You are the one to blame.

The now silent heart slowly dies unaware of its gradual fate as despair trickles into the cold voids where the dream once lived. Day after day the darkness kills thoughts before they transform into action bringing a paralysis to life. Moving deeper and deeper into hopelessness, the childhood dream no longer exists. Replaced with a cold hatred that the song of lies was ever heard. Death is the only escape and love is a lie."

MMMMMUTHA!!

just kidding. my spirits have definately risen a bit, thanks to Kiel and our Trading Places res activity. the guys' floor decorated our place, and it's actually pretty nice. our furniture's been rearranged and we've got new, really pretty purple cups with a purple vase on our dining table, orange placemats and coasters, matching tablecloth and little flag thingies, and valentine's decorations on the wall. oh yea...we also a a large penis made of little hearts on the wall as well. fantabulous! but it was fun and now i have to do fucking macgamut.

no more thinking about STUFF. i'm spent.

*big smile* i love Waterloo

great. so now it's MY fault. god...
i knew this wasn't going to work. knew it. i regret starting anything.

***

fucking macgamut due wednesday. fuck. i hate this. staying thru reading week. what to do what to do? whatever. i'll just shoot myself. no kidding. heh heh..that'll be fun. in the meantime, i should find me some boys... where's Brady?

i honestly don't know why i still come back. nothing good ever comes out of it. if it's not my family, it's my "friends". holy fuck. i'm pissed and i've held this in for far too long.
ok maybe it's because i hardly ever see you guys, and you don't like explaining shit to me cuz i'm never there for it, or maybe i'm just not "cool" enough, because i don't smoke, i don't know, but i know i hate not knowing what goes on around here, or in guelph, or whereever, and i think you should know too, since y'all claim to be my friends. it really doesn't seem it thogh. no one tells me shit, am i really that low and not worth telling anything to? like holy fuck. i hope you guys will take time out of your precious lives and step into my shoes and think about it in my perspective, because it really hurts me. i don't know what you all really think of me. i've been told you think i'm some innocent little girl who knows nothing, and i'd just like to tell you that if you think that, you really don't know me at all. which is really upsetting in itself. and if it isn't, i'd really like to know what it is, intead of being just kicked aside. i've tried putting myself in your shoes, and i came up with a couple of reasons why you wouldn't want me around, but if it were a problem, why didn't you speak to me about it?
anyways, i hope the ones who i'm directing this to, and i think you know who you are, will take this seriously, because certain people (not naming names) do not ever take my seriousness seriously. it is not a laughing matter. this has happened one too many times. i've always tried to push it away, think the problem is probably just me, but i've been fair, and i really don't know what makes you think that i don't compare to you all. i would honestly like to know.

and i bet no one ever going to respond anyway, and i've just wasted half an hour of my unmeaningful life. i hope you're happy. goodnight. i hope you are all having the time of your lives. happy birthday nique.

DONE. that's it. i'm spent.

i'll post more later.

damn, i just realized my post from last night wasn't really that long. ah well... i'm eating kinder chocolate...so yummay! heh heh
YAY i'm gonna be at aci tomorrow! i'm so excited!! hehehe! i hope i get to the bus station by 9:30! *cross fingers*

anywhoo...i'm bored.... i should go practise, or do something, productive, but...meh. i'll do it later.

i've just realized, after reading a couple blogs here and there, how long it has been since i've written a serious long post. you might be thinking "what about sleep? you have 8:30 class tomorrow!" and this is what i'm gonna say to that: "fuck sleep. i'm gonna blog!"

So anyways, tihs week has gone by pretty fast. hard to imagine, especially with all that happened last weekend. party at beth's (well not so much the "partying" but the "after hanging-out-ing"). oh and more on that before i move on to the next point: i haven't heard of him or seen him since then so nothing is ever coming out of it. i have stopped thinking about it or anything related to it. end of story. for those of you who don't know what the hell i'm talking about...too bad. muahaha. just kidding... uh, yea. i don't really wanna repeat it, especially now that it's definately done.
moving on.... sunday was hard on me and matty. after we broke up, i went shopping, even though i had an essay to write. i had to go out, seriously. but the shopping trip was good. it made me take my mind off stuff... and put it on other stuff...like shopping. i bought a new shirt. it's black and lacy. i told margaret about it, and she was like "ooo sexy!! i have to see it sometime!" anyways... speaking of margaret, she's been super supportive lately. i love her to bits! i can't wait to see her friday! we might go skating! she told me she's really into it now, and goes every week with her sister. awww...
School has been a drag, and quite a bore, might i add. even religions, a class i've always looked forward to going because i don't fall asleep in it, is getting boring. we watched a movie on tuesday about Carl Jung and his research on dreams, then suddenly, it turned to something about star Wars. i'm sure there was something to it in the middle, but i dozed off. it sucked. then we had to talk to our classmates about the movie, so i started talking to this girl behind me, and neither of us knew what was going on about the Star Wars thing.
Orchestra is fun, but not opera. it was soooo goddamn boring. but the singers are really good! oh! and today in orchestra, the guy whom i met on the first day of school who showed me a secret way to the T.A on registration day, came and sang with us! i didn't know his name ever, because i don't know him, but i call him Van Gogh, because he looks like him. anyways! the point of this story is that he came to our orchestra rehersal! he's gonna sing to one of our songs! yay Van Gogh!
anywhoo... oh yeah.. denny was gonna come visit me on tuesday, but it was snowing so he didn't come. i was looking forward to seeing him too. ah well...i'm supposed to call him when i get to toronto on friday. bahhh...

anyways, i'm talking to matty now and i can't concentrate, so i am gonna go now. bub byyyeee!

it's been an okay day. piano was boring as usualy, like skills and breakfast. didn't get too much practising done, cuz mike j. was in the grand piano room and i was listening to him. orchestra was fun- no opera! hung out with mike and trace after orchestra. then went home and watched American Idol.

it's still hitting at night... ahh letters.... but i'm trying to fight it...it's not really workin. bah. sorry matty.
umm.... can't wait til i come home to aci friday. got some mixed feelings...but i'm sure everything will go great. i'm excited to see everyone, and hopefully, i'll go skating with margaret and party with nique, cus it's her birthday! YAY! (ah frig...she has a chem midterm saturday... poooo)

umm...oh yeah! since tracy reads my blog now i'm gonna give her a shout out-- HI TRACE! HAHAHAHAHA!! just kidding...i'm not crazy. well..maybe a little.

anyways...yes, i really should do some work...maybe edit my essay? at least it's DONE! whew! now just gotta concentrate on Play&Sing on friday... goddamn. ok well...that's 'bout it fer now. gotta work a bit before floor meeting at 10. LATES. (HAHAHA michael jang)

go me


Love. You Truly Desire Love. You long for someone
to hold you and take the pain away. You haven't
been in much relationships or you need to work
on how to handle them. You always seem lost in
a daydream about the person you care about
most.

What Do You Truly Desire?
brought to you by Quizilla

i coudn't really sleep last night, so i was up kinda late. heh...well anyways, i couldn't get up this morning either. ah well. i got up anyways. psych was not as bad as it could be. we got a couple laughs. morgenson was talking about blood types, and was telling us the percentage of the world population with which blood types, so we started taking notes, obviously. and then he stopped and he's like "why are you taking notes? think you should start writing the minute i talk just in case it shows up on an exam? isn't this interesting?? c'mon! be cool!" hahh anyways..yea. then denny (my cousin) called me, and i had to cut his call til after class. he called to say he couldn't come visit after all cuz of the bad weather conditions. he was going to today. him and his gf broke up yesterday and he was really upset and wanted to hang out so i'm like, "yea sure come visit, you can attend my masterclass. i'm sure jerzy won't mind." but anyways, he didn't so....i guess another time. ah well...i was looking forward to it too. i'm craving to see familiar people. *shrug*

aaaanyways. uhhhh....yea, that's about it.

Stop hitting!
i need to get over it.
my mind is all blotchy now.
fuck.
no one to turn to.

this space i've stay in far too long. i need to get out.
nowhere to go.
fuck.


***
can't get friday night outta my head.
***

HAPPY GROUNDHOG DAY!!!!!

i say this calls for a celebration!

it was a long night. talking was fun. soooo damn tired this morning though. i seriously need a nap. i could take one now, if i weren't blogging. but i'm blogging, so i guess that's outta the question. i feel somewhat better.

anyways, if y'all haven't noticed, i put up a tagboard because i noticed that my comments thing isn't working, so..yea, free free to tag me! i've nothing else to say, so...bub bye

Suddenly it's all clear. i'm okay. i'm happy.

i'm lying.

but i'm trying to be.
it's over.

can anyone make me feel better?

nope.

practising really did help last night. it was fun. i didn't get too much stuff down but me, brendon, steve and this trombone girl got together in one of the practise rooms and had a jamming session. we sang various jazz songs. it was fun! there's this one song called How Long Has This Been Going On by George Gershwin, and the lyrics were really dirty! funny to sing to though. hahaha
i brought my violin back to rez so i can play a bit of Scheherazade. i didn't play too long, cuz then Mel and Allison came back.

And it's Sunday today. THE Sunday. i wonder what's going to happen. i still haven't really decided what i want yet. well i'm sure we'll be able to work something out. *sigh* anywhooo, i really gotta do my religions essay. Mike helped me with it a bit last night, he's really good at that type of stuff. got me started. now i gotta finish. pa-poofta! ta-ta-cheerio!