halloween was kinda shit, other than the fact that i got to dress up. me and aurora just went to diff. places incl. dan haid's place. crazy. yay music parties, but not really becuz i barely hang out with any of them any more. stopped by the Rude. saw nate shaughn rachel rory (!) cam and coryyy(!!) well i guess shaughn and nate and i are okay now. i don't know? whatever, i don't really care.

went to starlight for a bit...12$ cover! wtf. well, aurora paid for me, so that's ok.. went back to dan's place and there was a styrofoam fight. bah. anyway.... aurora got uber drunk and it was not fun getting home because she kept going on about nick storring. ugh. anyway... that's about it. i want candy.

geog. lab today was actually not so bad. i learneded. :) i can now watch the weather channel and understand what they're talking about!

oh... on sat. when kat and aurora got home from the choir concert, kat told me that cynthia...died.?
wtf?
i'm pretty sure it's the cynthia i know. johnson? french horn? boyfriend who works at long and mcquade?
fuck.
can't believe it.
why do friends die around this time of year?

2 more days til 2 yrs since Aaron died. damn... it's been two yrs already.... feels like last month. *sniff*

i wanna go to Cynth's funeral. shit... i need to get in touch w/ Brandon (her bf).... and maybe delete her off my MSN list? hm... and also, i guess i can't return her book to her anymore. shiat.

makes me think of how quickly and easily people, esp. friends can go. honestly... i remember it wasn't too long ago i saw her online. and maybe a month ago last time i talked to her about school in Nipissing. anyone of us could be next. goddammit, thinking. i am sad. comfort me?

alright, i'm outtie.

***

edit: ok so it is the Cynthia i know. just went to L&M to see if brandon was working. he wasn't. i just left a message with someone who worked there. called Beth to see if she was gonna go tomorrow, but she's not home, so i left a message as well. so we'll see. hard not to cry on the bus, because reality sunk in.