a million thanks to my buddy ryan, and my bestest cousin audrey for honestly trying to help me.

no thanks to alex

two days of school and one concert left. hardcore studying and practising. guido and i have been making babies lately, i am sooo in love with practising. i am excited about busking this summer. and i need a new job.

i........ don't even know what to say.
it's been a long and terrible day. and i am pissed.

well, i had a shitty weekend.

i think it all started last night when me and mikey made plans to go out for a coffee. well, when i pulled out of the driveway, i could tell that something was wrong with the car, because the steering wheel kept going towards the right. i didn't really think anything of it until i got to maybe halfway past midland to kennedy, i noticed that the car was also bumping around. it got pretty bad when i turned into mikey's street, so i called my mom. i told her it was all weird and shit. mikey was waiting on the driveway for me, and when he got in, i told him, and he took a look at it, and the front right tire was completey flat. argh. so yea. i had to call my dad and tell him, and he drove over and lent me his CAA card, so i called them and got someone to come change our tire. i told my dad they could leave since i thought that the dude would just fix it and leave, and there would be no point waiting. so he left, and i had his card still. so the dude came to fix my car, and there were a couple of rough points because i didn't really know anything about the car, so...yeah... anyways, after he finished i had to show him the card and my driver's license, and then we kinda got into trouble because apparently my dad (the cardholder) was supposed to be there while he fixed the car, and now he had to charge a cash fee. so me and mikey were like...um... okay? so we had to fork over $20. i only had 10 on me, so THANK YOU MIKEY for lending me the other 10! i think he ripped us off though. bah. after that we drove to Cafe Mirage, where i remembered i didnt bring my wallet because i had no idea i would really need it, hence i couldn't go to the bank and get money to pay him back, and neither of us had money for coffee anymore. so i was really pissed off. i dunno if mike was, but he wasn't showing it. so we just ended up going back to his house, chatted for a bit, then i left.

when i got home, i called my cousin in HK, who teaches there for some advice about working there and teaching and such. anyway... i haven't spoken to her in years, and i guess i was hoping that she would be excited about me calling, but uh, yeah... she really wasn't. it was pretty dry. well, she answered my questions but it was very straight forward and formal. and then she's like "are you at home? i'm out, can i call you back tonight?" and i told her no because i had a violin lesson in the morning then i'm going back to Loo. (HK is 12 hrs ahead of Toronto) so anyway... i got off the phone even more pissed off. then i had this talk with my mom. well... more of an arguement. i think i was just blowing off steam from the shitty phone call. ugh. whatever. then my mom and i started arguing for real, then i told her i'm going to bed. whatever. this is exactly the reason why i don't tell her shit.

anyway... today brightened up a bit. my dad came with me to my lesson, then treated me to lunch, then drove me back to Loo. it was cool. then i ushered the orchestra concert, which was fucking AMAZING. i don't remember who told me, but someone told me that this was the concert they were least ready for, but it seriously sounded great. i miss orchestra. next yr when i'm in psych, i'm gonna try to take orchestra still. i should probably ask janice if i could. but i'm pretty sure it won't be a problem. i really want to play Andrea ad Lorna's pieces. it's gonna be so good!

well... one more week + 1 day of school left before exams. i seriously can't wait. i am so sick of school. i guess taking two courses in the summer won't help much, but i just really want to finish and get my damn degree and get the hell out of here.

um, alright. well.... i'm outtie. skills tomorrow. yay.

it's not official yet, but i am now a psych student. i just signed up for my first ever course that is not psychology or music. it was scary. julie was sitting beside me (i'm in the CAI lab) and she said i look absolutely terrified. i told her i was. the course code starts with GG. it's a geography course, but it should be interesting.... we'll see.

oh, and if all goes well, i should be able to get my degree by the end of the next fall term. exciting!

fashion n' motion was pretty cool, although i almost fell asleep during the first half. i saw the security dude from the Duke! well, apparently, he goes to WLU. it was cool seeing him there, since i saw him last night too...haha... weird.

anyway... i really don't want to work at the rude anymore. i realized last night that the rude crowd really isn't my type of people. i mean, i love working with rory and cam and claire, but i dunno... it could be better. it could be not working for heidi, that fucking fat bitch. lol. and i love how alex always talk trash to me about becca and how much he fucking hates her. it's really funny. becca is heidi's roommate, who also works at the rude. me and alex and nate concluded that becca is a robot, she has no emotions. i'm actually really starting to notice that. it's freaky.

anyway, i think i've landed paying gig, thanks to troy! it's not for sure yet, but he said he'll get back to me. it's apparently for some super rich guy's party. haha. and then i'm supposed to play at his parents party too. damn, he was serious about that, i thought he was joking when he first told me. lol! troy is so hilarious. i'm excited to meet his family. katie (his gf) said they're a million more times crazier than him. haha! and his friend steve has this studio at his house (which i've been to, it's awesome) and apparently, steve has an electric violin, so i might be able to play around with it! whoooo....

goal for the week: practise the g-min sonata hardcore and play it at open mic on tuesday.

out with the new, and in with the old.
i hate school, i hate people, and well.... pretty much everything. so sick of pretending. and yeah.... the thing i was gonna try to do, the opportunity never came up. now i'm having second thoughts, becuase i don't think it's really the best thing to do right now.

fuck...

ok whatever. i'm just having inner issues.

ok, sorry about this post. ("let's make a joke"- Swinden)

i'm outtie.

edit: two people fainted in two days. fucking music program.

so my entire weekend had been really really great, i don't think i've had a good weekend like that since before christmas. sat. night,i went to ren. (for the first time! YAY!) with keith and his work friends. they were all really cool to hang out with, except when we left and went back to his manager's house, i realized that one of them is kinda whorish. i'm not saying she's a whore, but... yeah, it's a long story, and i'll leave it at that. she's still a nice girl. but all in all, ren. was awesome! i had suuuuuch a good time! i didn't pick up, nor did i get picked up. well... maybe next time! *tee hee!* i can't wait to go back!

anywhoo... all good things must come to an end. and yesterday at school was craptacular. surprisingly, my highlight of the day (other than jamming at wilf's) was when i was working at the recital hall. well, after everyone left and tyson and i were cleaning up and stuff, we had this convo about philosophy, and it made me think. old philosophers were sexist, eh. according to tyson, the top of the food chain were male philosophers (cuz no woman can be a philosopher), then it would be regular men, then women (*gasp!), then dogs. what the fuck. damn them all! but now i want to take a philosohy course.
i also practised hardcore yesterday, it's so exciting! i'm so into my Bach G-min sonata! well, partly because i did my paper on it in mus. history last semester. but yeah! i really like it! yaayyy, and my violin hickey is coming back! this is oh-so exciting!

anyway, it was clara's birthday yesterday, and we all chilled at wilf's. me, adam ruzzo and glenn jammed for the open mic. it was fun! there were a couple of people who really sucked, but...uh...yeahh.... anyways... good times al 'round.

kay.. i'm bored of posting, so i'm gonna stop. open mic at the rude tonight, and i think i'm actually going to play something that i prepared, instead of mindlessly improving with tim. not that that isn't fun, but you know....
anyways... alright, i'm outtie.

wow... just got home. what an awesome fucking day, seriously! :D
skipped theory today (for the first time!) to finish up my history paper. after i handed it in, it was like a wave of relief washing over me. the biggest hurdle was over! (exams don't really count, since they're a given). the only homework i have tihs weekend is to memorize my song for vocal tech, and i already know most of it, so it's all good.

beth's breakfast this morning was AMAZING. it was sooooo much fun! and bacon!! omg, i haven't had bacon in over a year! mmm... singing Irish jigs were hilarious! i loved that response song, it's soooo funny! and the one about seamus and michael and all the sons. hahaha! parading to skills was a life experience i won't soon forget. tee hee

after the usher meeting, i seriously had nothing to do. i haven't not had anything to do on a friday in a looooooong time. i had a wicked cool convo with keith. it was le fun. then he had to go to rehersal, so i wnet to the cai lab and brendon let me listen to this really funny song about racism. it was terrible, but funny. then i went home, did my hair, and went to 360 and shopped! :D yiay! then i wnet to work, where, thanks to heidi and peter, made my day a bit less amazing. but whatever, they can go fuck themselves. or each other.

...oh, God!! scratch that! ugh.... that was a really disturbing mental image. *shudder*...

okay... anyway... it was pretty busy tonight, for obvious reasons. i finished at quarter to 1am. bah. i stayed and hung out til other people finished up. mainly Rory, and Nate. then Alex showed up (well, he showed up earlier while i was still working, then he left). then Jen's sister showed up, and they made fun of Becca, who is heidi's bitch. haha... i mean... roommate.... haha.. yeah. anyway... and Alex got overexcited about basketball, and after a while, rory left. anyway.... details set aside, it was an amazing night,... and day!

it's all about the life experiences. *smiles*

good news:
- i'm getting better! i just have a sore throat now. i can taste and semi-smell again!

bad news:
- i didn't get to win that corset i really really really wanted. ugh... i'm still pissed off about it.
- work kinda sucked today. i had to clean up puke. it was fucking disgusting. god, i can't stand people who can't even aim and barf in the toilet. the puke was right beside it. ugh. but Tony let me out right after that, so yay! but becuase of my history paper, i left right away. i was hoping to chill with Alex for a bit after work, but he wasn't finished when i finished, and i didn't really feel like staying while Heidi's there.
- i seriously need a scanner or something... i want Kurzweil to read my books for me! and i need my history book cd! it was supposed to be ready on monday, but Jane didn't have any blank cds, and was also missing a bunch of chapters. oh well.
- two more days to do my hist. paper! ahhhh!!!

ok, i'm done dinner.... break's over, now i gotta do my paper.

i am sick.
i'll try not to breath on anyone.

wow... definately NOT impressed with Fairchild TV. *shakes head in disgust*... didn't i make it perfectly clear that i don't want filming in my house? well, i gave in to that, but now they can't film at Sick Kids at all!! WHAT THE FUCK. seriously. i am so pissed. and don't give me any bullshit about not being able to get approved by the hospital. you're just not prepared. and Anita, you're not much better. fuck, next time you want someone to do something for you, fuckin be organized. goddammit!

- my experience with the writing center was only bittersweet. i was hoping they could've helped me more. oh well.

- Kat's party was fun, although i was only there for like 20 minutes. was sooo tired, but still dropped by the Rude to see Craig and Johnny play. but i got there too late. they finished. :( so i chilled there a bit, and this one customer at the bar came over to me and started talking to me and asking me personal questions about my family. johnny later told me he's been hitting on everyone that night. ugh. it freaked me out. then we went to Failte's for a bit. then i bussed home.

- Heidi (my boss at RN) commented on my corset. she said i should get a black one and wear it for work. i was kinda surprised, because i didn't know we could wear corsets to work. so now i'm on the lookout. well... i always did want a black corset, but all the good ones are so damn expensive. i need to save up for travelling. we'll see.

- got more ideas about travelling. i really don't know what i should do.

- got a cool trial version on a learning software. it is fuckin' awesome!! it reads out loud to you, and if they don't have your textbook on tape, you can scan in whatever page you want (textbook, library book, anything!) and the program will read it to you. oh! and you get to choose what voice you want reading your stuff, it's sooo great! like, male and female voices, younger sounding, or older sounding. and you can highlight and make notes from it, give you definitions on the words you don't understand in the book, even make mp3 files (if you have your own definition of a word, you can record it), and a bunch of other neat stuff. i need to email my consultant and ask if i will be funded when i get my scanner and such. that will be awesome, because i can get a free scanner, and free software (if i decide to get the real version. i most likely will) this is exciting.

- a great big thank you to all that made this happen.

1. HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY MAR-BEAR! YAY you are 20!

2. looooove The Sugar Quill! it's getting really good!

3. i have mild ADHD. who'd a thunk it?

4. seriously, i was freaked out about my dying dreams, and now i have severly deformed dreams. meaning... the people in my dreams are physically really deformed and bleeding everywhere. it is freaking the shit out of me.

5. two days to write my hist. essay, do theory homework, go to the fringe festival, go to the opera and try to pop in at the Rude to chill. ahh!!

ok, time for food.